On Friday, I was talking to a friend who was complaining about something they did because it needed to be done. My response was directly from Bill. We discovered early on in our relationship that each of us had different priorities when it came to housework and how we spent our only day off every week.
What I said was one of the things Bill and I discovered that made our relationship last in a way that was sheer joy: Whatever you do, do it either for yourself or as a gift, but never as a demand upon you or the other person. If it is a gift then you do it, enjoy it, and expect nothing in return. If you are doing it because you need it to be done, then let it go because you have done it to make yourself feel better.
If we could learn to live life, do things, and give money and gifts with grace then we would relieve our lives of so much pressure, resentment, and bitterness. None of that is needed if what you did or gave was an act of grace, a free unconditional gift. Learning to make life a gift of grace is a new challenge for most of us.
Rev. Michael Piazza